Hidden Prophices Sarcastic Commentary
by Kitewing
Summary: A sarcastic commentary to a terrible trollfic. Join Moonshimmer as she saves her Clan from her evil brother Lilyblossom!
1. Intro

Hello there, and welcome!

I'd like to say that yes, I know Hidden Prophices is a trollfic. but I saw so many opportunities for a sarcastic commentary that I had to at least give it a shot. (And let me tell you, this story deserves to be shot. Print it and shoot it.)

Now, this story isn't nearly as badgood as Starkit's Prophecy, but that's already been commentaried, and I'd ever be as good as The Magic Catgirl anyway.

Now, the disclaimers. Hidden Prophices is not my story, it belongs to Tainted Purification. I am merely being very sarcastic about it. Also, I will most likely say a few things that some people may find mildly offensive. If you are terribly offended, please tell me. If you are reasonable (no OMGZ IM SO OFFNDEED BY UR TALKSINGS!1!one!) I will change it to be less offensive. However, I hope there is no need for this. Remember, nobody is forcing you to read this, and if you are offended you may leave.

Whew, glad I got that over with.

So buckle your seatbelts, back up copies of your brain, and enjoy the ride with free commentary and lulzy typos!

Don't die!


	2. ALLEGIANECES

_(Editor's note: My notes are in bold italics. The author's will simply be bold.)_

ALLEGIANECES:

SAPPHIRECLAN:

Leader: Vanillastar, a cream-colored tom with blue eyes

Deputy: Sparklefur, a jet black she-cat with violet eyes _**(Yeah, I can definitely see a queen naming her kit Sparklekit.)**_

Medicine Cat: Startalon, a long-haired gray tom _**(Seriously?)**_  
(apprentice: Tranquilpaw)

Warriors:

Talonclaw, a dark tabby tom with gray eyes and long, sharp claws

Sunsetshine, a ginger tabby she-cat with blue eyes

Mockingbirdheart, a stormy gray tom  
(apprentice: Moonpaw)

Cursedheart, a black and white she-cat with green eyes _**(Isn't this a beautiful, happy name?)**_

Thunderingbreeze, a broad-shouldered dark tabby tom

Webstream, a gray tabby  
(apprentice: Screepaw)

Braveheart, a flame-colored tom with green eyes _**(Five bucks says he's a coward.)**_

Gazingflight, a silver she-cat

Beetlescar, a long-furred gray tom _**(Look! I was scarred by a beetle! Aren't I manly?)**_

Shadowseeker, a black tom _**(I want Mockingbirdheart, Shadowseeker, Thunderingbreeze, and Reallylongnamecat on patrol to the Stupidlongridiculousnamerocks!)**_

Glasswater, a pure white she-cat with blue eyes  
(apprentice: Lilypaw)

Apprentices:

Screepaw, a blue-gray tom with one black paw

Moonpaw, a beautiful white she-cat with a black crescent moon on her forehead and glistening violet eyes _**(Five bucks says she's the **__**Mary-Sue **__**protagonist!)**_

Tranquilpaw, a black and white she-cat

Lilypaw, an orange tom with blue eyes _**(Lilypaw is a very manly name, no?)**_

Queens:

Goldenmask, a beautiful golden she-cat with green eyes

Mysteryheart, a black she-cat with blue eyes

Elders:

Oddpelt, a calico tom-cat with one eye _**(And it's his **__pelt __**that's odd?)**_

Polarsong, an old gray she-cat with gray eyes

RUBYCLAN:

Leader: Rainbowstar, a black tom with red paws _**(Ooh, a manly rainbow leader tom!)**_

Deputy: Ambercrystal, an auburn she-cat with beautiful blue eyes _**(A very realistic warrior's name that could easily have appeared in the books, yup!)**_  
(apprentice: Sorrowpaw)

Medicine Cat: Almondfeather, a brown tabby she-cat

Warriors:

Mallowbelly, a spotted tabby tom with blue eyes

Toadbrook, black tom  
(apprentice: Ghostpaw)

Dewflight, a white she-cat with ginger flecks

Eagletooth, a white tom with sharp teeth _**(Silly author, eagles have no teeth!)**_

Rockwatcher, a brown tabby tom with a white underbelly _**(His life must be very boring.)**_  
(apprentice: Fallenpaw)

Sneezenose, a tawny-colored she-cat _**(Sneezemud would have been a much better name, if you ask me.)**_

Bubbledusk, a cute black-and-white tom _**(So many manly names!)**_

Apprentices:

Ghostpaw, a ghastly-looking white she-cat

Fallenpaw, a gray tabby tom

Sorrowpaw, an orange tabby she-cat

Queens:

Reflectionsoul, a tabby she-cat with blue eyes _**(Her soul is a mirror!)**_

Elders:

Treefoot, a lively old tom with blue eyes _**(Trees are very lively.)**_

Lilacflower, a brown she-cat with lilac-colored eyes

Cornerstone, a gray and white tom

EMERALDCLAN:

Leader: Dragonstar, a strong black tom with green eyes

Deputy: Icybreath, a prickly gray tom _**(Needs some Icebreakers!)**_

Medicine Cat: Blazingfox, a long-haired red tom _**(Aaah! A fox!)**_

Warriors:

Bleedinglove, a smoky gray tabby with red eyes. _**(Seriously, who wrote this? A five-year-old?)**_

Cleargaze, a white she-cat  
(apprentice: Ivorypaw)

Icefrost, a gray flecked tom

Startwinkle, a black and white she-cat _**(Reincarnation of Stargleamstar!)**_  
(apprentice: Freezingpaw)

Mangledsoul, a white tom with black ears

Mournfulphantom, a long-haired red tabby she-cat _**(Wow. Just wow.)**_  
(apprentice: Serpentpaw)

Crimsonrose, a stunning white cat with orange tabby patches _**(I'm not a tom, I'm not a she-cat, so I can be with everyone!)**_

Shiverhoot, a gray and white tom _**(Half owl, half ice, half off if you pay extra shipping and handling!)**_

Apprentices:

Ivorypaw, an ivory colored she-cat with blue eyes

Serpentpaw, a ginger tom

Freezingpaw, a brown tabby she-cat

Queens:

Snowinfero, a gorgeous tortoiseshell she-cat _**(This is the weirdest name...)**_

Elders:

Attackstrike, a one-eyed old calico tom _**(Don't attack Strike!)**_

Tornadozephyr, a black and white tom _**(What?)**_

DIAMONDCLAN:

Leader: Nebulastar, a calico tom with blue eyes _**(Since when do cats know what a nebula is?)**_

Deputy: Snowflake, a puffy white she-cat with green eyes _**(Former kittypet, rose in the ranks **__very__** quickly, if you know what I mean!)**_

Medicine Cat: Troubletail, a long-haired gray she-cat _**(Your tail is sooo busted!)**_  
(apprentice: Gaypaw)

Warriors:

Hammerclaw, a dark brown tabby tom with amber eyes _**(This is how I can tell it's a trollfic and not an honest attempt: Hammerclaw was Tigerclaw's original name.)**_  
(apprentice: Onyxpaw)

Shiningpower, a small ginger tabby she-cat _**(I'm so scared!)**_

Phoenixwhisker, a fire-colored tom with green eyes

Ruinedspirit, a silver she-cat _**(What a kind mother.)**_  
(apprentice: Dancerpaw)

Terrorglare, a white and black tom _**(Terrorkit? The moms here are messed up.)**_

Witheringbones, a brown she-cat with blue eyes _**(Nebulastar must be a real jerk. Not that I blame him, with that name...)**_  
(apprentice: Angelpaw)

Neonflash, a white she-cat

Apprentices:

Dancerpaw, a brown spotted she-cat

Onyxpaw, a black tom

Angelpaw, a white she-cat with a black muzzle

Gaypaw, a dusky brown tom with green eyes _**(Seriously, how messed up are the moms in this **__**disgrace**__** story?)**_

Queens:

Dazzlemoon, a spotted gray tabby she-cat

Sugarplumspirit, a brown tabby she-cat _**(I am the fairy sugarplum queen!)**_

Berrysonnet, a dappled golden she-cat _**(Poetry. In the form of a cat.)**_

Elders:

Windwalker, a brown-and-white tom _**(Who cares if Jesus walks on water? I can walk on wind!)**_


	3. Chapter 1

The wind was blowing loudly! The cats of EmeraldClan were huddled together to keep warm, but most of them still felt the chill! It was as cold as icy snow on frozen ground in the middle of Leafbare. Trudging through the snow to get into the camp was a beautiful young white she-cat, her eyes clouded with sadness, and her heart was pounding in her chest as she stumbled and fell onto the ground! She began to give birth to her kits, in the middle of the awful weather. No cat wanted to leave the warmth of their den to help her. _**(Wow, what a nice and caring Clan you have.)**_

The moment she had given birth to the last kit, the wind and the storms stopped, and there was calm. _**(Le gasp!)**_

The warriors walked out of the den to congratulate the she-cat, only to find she was dead! Mournful yowls came from several members of the Clan, and they gathered up the kits and took them to the nursery to let them suckle from the other queens. "It is too bad that Daydreamheart is dead." One of them whispered to another. "She was always such a good, kind-hearted cat, and it is a shame that she had gone on to StarClan."

"Yes, it is." Said another queen. "There will never be another cat like her."

"Perhaps some of her wonderful virtues will be have passed down onto her gorgeous young kits." Meowed yet another, digging her claws into the red, soft clay of the Earth. "Speaking of her kits, what should we call them?"

The queens murmured for a moment, thinking of different names. "I believe we should name this beautiful one right here Moonkit, because of the crescent moon on her forehead." _**(Mary-Suekit would have been a better name, but okay.)**_

All the other queens nodded in agreement. "We should name this one Tranquilkit, because she looks so peaceful and happy."

"And the last one we should call Lilykit, because he looks like a bright orange tiger lily!" _**(The epitome of manliness is to be a tomcat named Lilykit.)**_

"Agreed. Now we can rest for a while, because I am very tired." A queen named Goldenmask meowed sleepily.

They all closed their eyes, but suddenly they woke up when they heard a very loud meow! Glasswater, a gorgeous pure-white queen gasped as she looked down at her litter of kittens. One of them had blood gushing out of their neck like a fountain! She cried loudly and licked her kit, begging it to wake up, but it didn't. "My poor Devilkit!" _**(What kind of mother names her son Devilkit?)**_

She gasped, tears running down her puffy cheeks, eyes bloodshot and red. "What happened to him? Has he been murdered?"

The queens looked around, and saw Lilykit, blood on his paws and muzzle, eyes narrowed as he pulled Devilkit by the tail and pushed him to the side. He then took his place by Glasswater's side, latching onto one of the nipples and suckling hungrily. _**(Five bucks says he's the antagonist.)**_

"You killed my kit." Glasswater sobbed. "But I forgive you, I will raise you as one of my own forever, and I will teach you that you can not kill to get what you want, because that is very, very bad." _**(Moron alert! He killed your son, for StarClan's sake!)**_

Moonkit scampered up to Glasswater and gave her a comforting lick on the cheek, her beautiful blue eyes glistening with sympathy for the poor queen. Even though she could not speak much yet, save for a few words, Glasswater could almost hear her meowing consoling words. "Thank you, young kit, you will be one of the best warriors in the forest one day, I can feel it in my heart with every beat." _**(Mary-Sue! Mary-Sue!)**_

"It is too bad about your little kit, Glasswater, but maybe it was for the best." One of the queens meowed. "After all, he might have grown up to be a terror to all of the Clans, and we wouldn't want that, would we?" _**(And yet you let her suckle a newborn MURDERER!?)**_

Glasswater shook her head and pulled Moonkit closer to her. "I suppose not, but still it is a shame!" _**(You'd think she'd be a little more upset...)**_

"I agree with you." Sighed Goldenmask, "I would be very sad if one of my kits was killed. That Lilykit will need to be taught a lesson, or else we may have a killer on our hands, one who could jeopardize all of our kits." _**(MAY have a killer on your hands? These cats are morons.)**_

"I do not think he meant it." One of the other queens purred. "Rough housing can go too far sometimes, it has happened many times before in the past, and it will happen again in the future." _**(See previous comment)**_

"Maybe you are right, but nonetheless, we could still keep an eye on him." Goldenmask said.

"I will, I will watch him and make sure he becomes a very good warrior. By the way, might I keep Moonkit for myself as well? She is so beautiful, like moonbeams, and she has such a sweet spirit, and I feel so peaceful when she is around me." _**(Sue!)**_

"You might as well raise the three of them." Suggested the other queen. "I have enough of them to take care of, I can not take care of another one!"

"Then it is settled." Goldenmask meowed. "You will raise them all, Glasswater."

"Alright." Glasswater said. "Let us get some sleep now."

All of the other queens meowed in agreement, and soon they had all fallen asleep. In the middle of the night, Lilykit snuck out of the nursery den! He headed over to the leader's den, with a look of malice in his sparkling blue eyes. With a swipe of his tiny, sharp claws, he cut the throat and belly of the leader, and watched as she twisted and turned, convulsing and coughing up scarlet colored blood. She died time after time, because StarClan could not heal her! _**(Yup, a newborn could easily kill a full-grown cat with nine lives.)**_

Lilykit slunk back out, his orange fur glowing in the glow of the glowing blue moon. _**(Sounds like something out of a Beatles song.)**_

He hissed at the stars, as if he were cursing StarClan themselves! He went back into the nursery and curled up next to his sisters, who were startled to see him covered in blood. They exchanged glances, but none of them spoke. Slowly, the drifted off to sleep, ignoring the stench of death that was filling their nostrils. _**(Because nobody likes a tattletale.)**_

In the morning, everyone woke up to the sun's intense glow as it peeked over the horizon. They crept out of their dens, only to hear wailing coming from the deputy, Vanillasnow. "What is wrong, Vanillasnow?" Asked one of the warriors, rushing over as fast as she could.

"Lavenderstar is dead!" Vanillasnow sniffled, burying his head in his paws.

"That is awful! What are we going to do now?! You need to go to highstones and get your nine lives, Vanillasnow!" Suggested Sparklefur.

"I will, and when I get back I will appoint a deputy. Who would like to go with me so that I can get my name and nine lives?" Vanillasnow asked, looking around at the crowd of cats.

"I will go with you," Said Mockingbirdheart, puffing his chest out as he walked up to stand by the sorrowful deputy.

Braveheart dipped his head in respect and meowed. "I will come too!"

"So will I." Said Sunsetshine, giving Vanillasnow a lick between the ears, and purring softly. "We must first go to the medicine cat and get herbs to so that we will not grow weary when we travel, because that would be bad, and we might get caught by a patrol from a rival Clan, and they could tear us to shreds, then who would lead the Clan?!" _**(**__**Mary-Sue **__**Moonkit, of course.)**_

"Yes, let us go to Startalon, he will provide us with the correct herbs." Vanillasnow said with a nod as he stood up and walked to the medicine cat den. "One of you go tell the elders to bury our precious leader's body, and make sure they put the freshest, most beautiful flowers like her eyes on the grave. I miss her because I loved her so much but I never go to tell her that I did." _**(Aww)**_

Lilykit peered out of the nursery, eyes glinting as he watched. Moonkit batted him on the ear and dragged him back into the den. "You killed the leader you mousebrain." She squeaked. "That is terrible! You are nothing but a mean cold-hearted killer, and you should be punished. I am going to tell on you, I'll go tell Vanillasnow!" _**(Good for you, Mary-Sue!)**_

"If you do I will kill you, too." Hissed Lilykit, his small tail thrashing back and forth like the crack of a leather bullwhip. "And you are no match for me, because even though I am just a kit, I am more powerful than any cat in the forest!" _**(Totally believable.)**_

"That is what you think, Lilykit, but your dark power is no match for the power of love and kindness." Moonkit insisted. _**(Mary-Suekit insisted)**_

Tranquilkit came up behind them, her eyes round as she listened to their conversation. "What do you mean Lilykit killed the leader? He couldn't have, that's terrible and mean!"

"I don't care, I will kill every last leader in the forest to get what I want!" Lilykit spat, turning around and scratching Tranquilkit on the cheek, leaving a long scar over her left eye. She fell back, blood leaking into her eye as she squealed in pain. "You are a terrible cat, and you should be exiled from the Clan!"

"They will never suspect me!" Lilykit growled. "Who would think a kit would be able to kill a Clan leader?! That's absurd! They would never believe that! They would think you two are mousebrained fools spewing foxdung lies!"

_**(Changing the subject...) **_"When will we become apprentices?" Asked Moonkit. "I want to be one as soon as possible, because I want to learn to be the best warrior in the forest!"

"I think we are too young for that," Replied Tranquilkit, her purple eyes flashing in the light of the early morning sun. "I heard that you become apprentices when you are six moons old."

"That is such a long time away!" Exclaimed Lilykit. "I must be an apprentice sooner than that!"

Moonkit shook her head. "You are a poor, poor kit, and you need help. You should not be thinking evil thoughts, you should only be thinking about good things."

"Mousedung!" He spat over and over again. "I do not have to listen to you, you goody-two-shoes furball! Leave me alone!" _**(Go Lilykit!)**_

He ran back into the den and curled in a ball in the corner. "I hope he does not turn out evil, because that would be awful." Tranquilkit mewed. _**(Well ya don't say!)**_

_Six moons later!_

"Today the kits will be made into apprentices, and they will train with mentors!" _**(Nope, they'll train with mothballs.)**_

Exclaimed Vanillastar, calling to his Clan to gather under the Large Jewel for a meeting. "Mockingbirdheart, you are now ready to take on an apprentice. You will be mentor to Moonkit. Mockingbirdheart, you have shown yourself to be a warrior of kindness and courage. I'm sure you will pass all you know to this apprentice."

Mockingbirdheart touched noses with the newly made Moonpaw, who had beamed the whole time the ceremony was going on. Vanillastar wasn't quite done making apprentices yet, though, he still had one cat left to go. "Glasswater, you are now ready to take on an apprentice. You will be mentor to Lilykit. Glasswater, you have shown yourself to be a warrior of strength and honor. I'm sure you will pass all you know to this apprentice."

"I will." Murmured Glasswater as she touched noses with her new apprentice. Lilypaw's eyes were, and he murmured something about Glasswater being a stupid old hag as they touched. Tranquilpaw had decided to become a medicine cat so she was not made a warrior apprentice. She would be studying under the very old, but very wise Startalon! _**(Remember, don't store your textbooks under his butt.)**_

"Good luck with your training, Moonpaw." Purred Tranquilpaw from the crowd. "I am very sure you will be the best warrior the forest has ever known, and I see it in the stars above us."

"Thank you my dear sister." Moonpaw meowed in reply. "I will try my best!"

"You'll never be a good warrior, but I will be, and some day I will rule the forest with an iron paw and every one will bow to my every whim and will, and you will all be my slaves!" Lilypaw hissed loudly, but no one seemed to hear him or care about what he was saying. They were all oblivious to the impending threat! _**(Told you they were morons.)**_

What was Moonpaw going to do?! What if Lilypaw was able to destroy the whole entire forest in a bloody massacre?! She would have to defeat him, but not in battle. She would defeat him with love, because love could overcome even the most evil of dark powers! "Lilypaw, we all love you so very dearly, why must you act this way towards us? It is just plain mean!"

"I am mean!" Lilypaw spat. "I am the meanest cat in the entire world, there is no cat meaner than me, because I am the meanest!" _**(Well ya don't say!)**_

"But being mean means you are not nice, _**(Thank you, Captain Obvious)**_ and without niceness the world is nothing more than a black hole! I believe that you will one day turn out to be a loving and caring cat like I am, it is only a matter of time, my dear brother." Moonpaw assured him, licking him all over tenderly.

"Nonsense, I can feel the darkness in my soul, and it is like evil ice running through ever last one of my veins." Lilypaw growled. "You will never make me a goody-goody like you, Moonpaw, you can forget about that! I am who I am, and I am evil!"

Moonpaw's eyes clouded with sorrow. She did not want her brother to go down the wrong path in life, she wanted him to be kind despite everything. "I only hope this will not last, it will hopefully just be a phase you are going through." She murmured as she turned around to go out to hunt with her mentor, Mockingbirdheart. She really liked her mentor, he was a noble cat who never did anything to harm another cat in battle if he could help it. Moonpaw wanted to be exactly like him!

Back at camp, Tranquilpaw was busy organizing herbs in the medicine cat den. Even though she had only been an apprentice for a few days, she already knew how to identify most of the herbs that Startalon had, and what to use them for. Startalon said that she was one of the quickest learners he'd ever seen before in his lifetime, which was a very long time because he was very, very old! _**(Bet he dies soon)**_

"I have finished organizing the herbs, Startalon! Is there anything else you want me to do?" She asked politely, giving her mentor a respectful dip of her head.

"That is all for now, my star apprentice, you are so good at this! You may be the youngest full medicine cat there ever was one day soon! I am very, very old, and I can not live forever, so one day you will have to take over for me." Startalon purred. _**(Duh)**_

"You are too kind, Startalon!" Tranquilpaw meowed in thanks. "I am going to the fresh-kill pile now to get something to eat, I will see you later!"

And so all of the kits became apprentices, but it was only just beginning of their adventure! _**(Ooh! Scary!)**_

NOTE! NOTE! NOTE!

_I worked really, really hard on this, so review it, okay?! It is my best story ever and I am really proud of it, so tell me what you think!_

_**(I think it sucks.)**_


	4. Chapter 2

**NOTE! NOTE! NOTE!**

_You stupid mean flamers just leave me alone, okay?! This is the best thing I have ever written and you are all just jealous because you can not write as good as me so just leave me alone! :( __** (Yes, we're all **__very__** jealous of your crappy writing skills.)**_

Moonpaw was stalking the prey that she had spotted then she dived for it! She slit its throat and let the blood flow all over her white paws that were the color of fresh fallen snow! _**(So! Many! Exclamation! Points!)**_ She looked to Mockingbirdheart and said. "I am become death, the destroyer of worlds." _**(Weirdo.)**_

"Now we are all mousebrains." Mockingbirdheart laughed loudly. Then he looked up at the blazing yellow sun and said, "It is getting late, I should take this fresh kill to camp. You hunt some more." _**(It's late enough for him to go home, but not the apprentice?)**_

Moonpaw tasted the air, besides the familiar scent of Mockingbirdheart, she smelled a rabbit! She started to bound towards the delightful smell! She stopped when she heard a two cats talking nearby. "The effects could well be called unprecedented, magnificent, beautiful, stupendous and terrifying." _**(Ooh! Conflicting words!)**_

Moonpaw knew that this was dire news and she needed tell Vanillastar immediately! Who knew what these cats were planning, they were using so many words she did not understand yet because she was only an apprentice. _**(Gasp! A flaw!) **_She burst towards the direction she thought was camp but was tackled by a badger! She used all her training and might and she managed to fight it off. As she saw it running away she said in a monotone voice, "It worked!" _**(Yup, because a new apprentice can easily beat a badger and feel nonchalant about it.)**_

She started running again towards camp when she plowed straight into a tree! She felt pain shoot through her body that hurt so bad! _**(HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!)**_

When she woke up she saw white, just white, everywhere, nothing else at all. She heard Startalon say, "Any cat whose errors take ten seasons to correct is quite a cat. Oh wait, she is coming to!" _**(Is quite a Mary-Sue!)**_

Tranquilpaw was saying, "Moonpaw, Moonpaw! Can you hear me!?"

Moonpaw was looking around confused, "Huh, wuh, how did I get here?" _**(Darnit, she's alive.)**_

Vanillastar came in, "You are lucky you are alive Moonpaw, you ran into that tree pretty hard. You where twenty foxlengths away from camp when you ran into that tree." _**(Ooh! Numbers!)**_

Vanillastar turned to leave, turning his right cream colored paw towards the exit, he moved his left paw into position. _**(Five bucks says he's a love interest.)**_ Swaggering his legs in line with his forepaws, he marched meaningfully _**(Everyone, take out your pencils and write a five sentence reflaction on the meaning of a cat walking.)**_ out from the dark dank den where the Medicine cats of SapphireClan had resided for longer than any cat could dare to remember. _**(Forget, or else!)**_ The left over right monotony showed the droning of the world and how Vanillastar longed longingly _**(No, he longed scarily) **_to be free from the punishment _**(Needs to get his priorities straight!)**_ of being leader of a clan of wild forest cats.

As he left, the light of the early morning sun glimmered off of his cream white coat like sun reflecting onto the mirror like surface of clean water. _**(Notice how the only description is of Mary-Suepaw and the other main characters?) **_After he got into the sun, he started to scamper off, showing how the sun set him free from his duty's as leader for the moment and he could be a normal cat again, walking through the forest, not having to worry about other clans attacking, not a care in the world. Free to wander as he wished free to follow a whim, but then, all the freedom came crashing down upon him like a canopy no longer supported. _**(Interesting simile.)**_

Sparklefur glided up to Vanillastar with an angry face, "I smelled RubyClan in our territory while I was out on patrol with Talonclaw."

Vanillastar wanted to lash out at her and tell her that she was interrupting his daydreaming of being free from the oppressing burden of being a clan leader, but no cat was to know of his secret ambition! _**(He had better not pull a Pinestar on us, he's too easy to make fun of!)**_ "That is not good, Sparklefur." He meowed loudly, eyes narrowed and burning like the stars in the silverpelt as he stared at her. "We must drive them away from our clan's territory at any cost, otherwise they might try to hurt all of our clan warriors and the queens and the elders and the kits and everyone else." _**(Nobody cares about the apprentices.)**_

"I will go and gather more warriors so that we can make sure that if they are still there we can drive them away." Sparklefur said obediently, rushing off to find someone to help her fight off the warriors of RubyClan!

"What is going on?" Asked Sunsetshine as Sparklefur rushed by him in a bounding manner, almost hanging in the air as she slowed to a sudden halt! _**(Welcome to the Gender Bender, Sunsetshine.)**_

"RubyClan is on our territory and we have to drive them off! Go get Thunderingbreeze, Gazingflight, Cursedheart, and Braveheart so that we can teach those terrible cats a lesson they will never forget for as long as they live!"

Sunsetshine looked both shocked and distraught as he rushed off towards where the warriors were gathered sharing tongues and eating prey from the fresh kill pile! _**(!)**_ They were all surprised to see him running towards them and they got up to leave because they thought that he was being crazy and wanted to kill them all. _**(Assume much?)**_ "Wait I am not trying to kill you!" He yowled loudly, and they came back to him.

"You scared us, Sunsetshine!" They exclaimed, breathing hard as they glared at him.

Sunsetshine looked utterly embarrassed as his ears grew hot and his pelt flushed _**(down the toilet, where this fanfic belongs.)**_. "I am sorry, it is just that RubyClan is on our territory and I had to come and get you so that we could drive them away before they hurt someone!"

"Wait!" Came a loud meow from the medicine cat den. It was Moonpaw, looking better already despite the fact that she had just nearly killed herself by crashing into a huge tree! _**(*Sue alarm shatters windows*) **_"You can not go and fight them, you must just talk to them!"

"Are you a mousebrained fool you stupid apprentice?" Growled Sunsetshine. "These are RubyClan cats and they will hurt us all!"

"If you provoke them they will only do more. At least try to speak with them before you start fighting. It is not like I do not approve of fighting, I just think there are better ways to deal with things!" Moonpaw sighed loudly.

"I suppose you are right." Meowed Sunsetshine. "We will try to speak with them first, but if anything bad happens it will be all your fault, you know!" _**(Everyone needs a scapegoat, and I approve of his/her choice!)**_

"Do not talk to her that way!" Hissed Tranquilpaw from behind Moonpaw. "You are just a stupid mousebrain, Moonpaw is ten times smarter than you will ever be! She is very kind and caring for telling you to talk to the RubyClan cats before you attack them. She could be saving you all from terrible, bloody deaths!" _**(Sue! Sue!)**_

Sunsetshine looked absolutely furious as his fur bristled. "You are not the bosses of me, you stupid apprentices! I will attack anyway despite what both of you say! Come warriors lets go teach those RubyClan cats that EmeraldClan cats are not afraid to get their paws dirty!" _**(Yay, a non-sue!)**_

He turned around and led all of the cats out of the camp. Lilypaw came trailing behind them, he wanted to fight because that was something he really liked to do. He enjoyed tasting the blood of his enemies in his mouth and feeling them squirm as they give their last dying breaths like the winds on the moorland slowly fading. It did not take them long to find the offending RubyClan, and they were hunting and eating lots of EmeraldClan food! _**(Le gasp!)**_

"You thieving cowards." Exclaimed Sunsetshine, launching himself at them loudly. He screeched as the enemy warrior ripped his belly apart and his guts spilled out onto the ground. _**(Well, he was good while he lasted.) **_Blood leaked everywhere shining in the midday sun! It flowed crimson until it had leaked onto the paws of every warrior standing around! Suddenly they all jumped into battle and began slashing at each other left and right. It could have all been avoided if they had listened to Moonpaw's wise and insightful words. _**(sarcasmWhoa, I never saw that coming!/sarcasm)**_

After the battle was all over many cats were laying dead on the ground, their bodies rotting in the sun and a terrible stench of death leaking through the forest all the way back to Moonpaw's nostrils! She bowed her head and had a moment of silence because she knew that what she had told them before had come straight from StarClan and if they had only listened to her blood would never have been shed on that day! _**(Poor Moonpaw, she's always right.)**_

Lilypaw and several other warriors and apprentices limped into camp, blood leaking from their wounds and fire in their eyes! Startalon and Tranquilpaw rushed to help them as they collapsed onto the ground. Suddenly Moonpaw remembered that she had something to tell Vanillastar, but she couldn't remember what it was! _**(Gasp! A flaw!) **_She thought she had heard something important out in the woods but she guessed that since she couldn't remember exactly what it was it wasn't too important. Vanillastar tiptoed carefully towards the injured warriors, fearing that one of them would still think they were fighting and lash out at him.

"What happened here? Why are they all bleeding was there a fight with another clan that I did not know about?" The leader meowed, worry all over his face and tears in his eyes.

"Do not be so upset there was just a simple border fight with RubyClan," One of the warriors said to him. "Sunsetshine and several others were killed. _**(Yup, definitely just a simple border fight.) **_We should have listened to Moonpaw before doing anything. She is a lot smarter and nicer than all of us." _**(#The Sue Alarm deafens everyone*)**_

Vanillastar was blocking out their voices with his mind. He did not want to hear any of it. He did not want to be the leader of the clan anymore! Too many cats were dying! "I quit, Moonpaw can lead if you think she is so great!"

"No no I am too young!" Moonpaw yowled. "Wait until I am older, please, Vanillastar. Let Sparklefur run the clan if you do not want to. When I am old enough I will take over leading the clan but for now I know that I am not experienced enough. But it is very flattering that you wanted to pass the leadership on to me and I thank you for that." _**(What? She declined? Oh, wait, it was for a Sueish reason. Never mind.)**_

"Alright." Said Vanillastar. "But I think I will lead the clan maybe just a little bit longer. Sparklefur can take over leading next week. _**(Hmm...) **_I never wanted this job to begin with. I only took the deputy position so that I could be closer to my love, Lavenderstar. But then she was killed by someone or something and now I have practically nothing left to live for except for this stupid leader job that I did not ever want to begin with!" _**(Huh. I actually feel sorry for him.)**_

"Calm down Vanillastar," Soothed Sparklefur. "We all know you are upset but there is no need to yell about all this out loud! What if another clan was spying and they heard that we were weak because our leader did not want to lead us? That would be very bad!"

"I agree with Sparklefur." Meowed Moonpaw. "We must be careful about what we say. RubyClan cats may still be lurking every where on our territory and if we showed them any sign of weakness they might not even hesitate to attack us!"

Vanillastar shut his mouth and closed his eyes. "I am sorry for my outburst." He apologized, feeling ashamed of himself. "I need to be punished somehow. I will go and clean out the elders den because I am no better than an apprentice myself!" _**(Hey, it's hard to compete with Mary-Sues and Scary-Stus.)**_

"That sounds like a good idea for you." Moonpaw meowed. "Remember that we do not think any less of you because you do not want to be leader. It is just too big of a job for some cats to handle and I can understand that you do not want to do it. I can feel in my heart that it was never your destiny!"

"Do you know what my destiny is?" Asked Vanillastar, turning around instead of continuing to walk away.

"I do but it is not for you to know right now. You will find out in good time, I promise you." Moonpaw said. "I have dreams from StarClan sometimes, I do not know why, though." _**(*The Sue Alarm spontaneously combusts*)**_

"It is because you are a very special and possibly very powerful cat." Said Startalon, dipping his head to touch Moonpaw on hers. "One day you might even save the clan from some terrible evil." _**(Well, we all know what's going to happen now...)**_

But Moonpaw already knew this. She was prepared, too, she was going to be the best warrior in the forest so that she could fight whatever troubles came. _**(*My new Sue Alarm blows up the world*)**_

_**And Chapter 2 is up! Sorry it took so long, I was busy with babysitting my brother (who thinks sitting on me is a great way to spend the afternoon...), but I promise that I'll post a chapter at least every other day from now on! Until then, keep your pants dry and your barf bag handy, because Hidden Prophices is getting ridiculed!**_

_**Kitewing out!**_


	5. Chapter 3

**NOTE! NOTE! NOTE!**

_All of you flamers are stupid so go away and leave me alone! I NEVER DID ANYTHING TO YOU SO JUST SHUT UP AND GO AWAY! __**(Yes, you did. You wrote this fanfic.)**__ I HATE YOU ALL! thakn you to all the people hwo support my writing, you are all nice and i appreciate it. ALL OF THE REST OF YOU GO AWAY! __**(Aww, but you're fun to hate!)**_

The sun shined brightly the next day! The grass was sparkling with morning dew and all the cats seemed happy! Moonpaw was especially pleased about this because there had been a terrible battle yesterday! She did not think the other cats would be happy again so soon. _**(Yay! Cats died! Be happy!)**_

She saw Startalon. "Startalon, do you know where Tranquilpaw is?" She asked him. She did not know where her sister was. _**(Thank you, Captain Obvious.)**_

"No, I am sorry." He told her. "I told her to go somewhere, but she has not returned."

"Where did she go?" Moonpaw was worried.

"I don't remember." Startalon looked very sorry, so Moonpaw forgave him for forgetting. She knew he was very, very old.

"It is okay!" She mewed. "I forgive you!"

"Thank you, Moonpaw." Startalon meowed. He bowed his head to her.

Moonpaw ran quickly to find Tranquilpaw. She was very thankful for being blessed with such speed! _**(Enter Sue Alarm) **_But she could not find Tranquilpaw anywhere!

"Tranquilpaw!" She called. "Where are you?" There was no answer, and Moonpaw became really worried!

Making sure that nobody saw her, Moonpaw ran out of the camp! (Apprentices are not supposed to go out of the camp without their mentors.) Moonpaw ran all the way to the river.

Moonpaw gasped! She saw Tranquilpaw touching noses with Screepaw by the river! _**(Le gasp! An overused plot device!) **_"Tranquilpaw!" She yowled. "Stop!"  
Tranquilpaw looked at her, her eyes filled with worry.

"Moonpaw, this is not what it looks like!"

"What is it, then?" She felt hurt and betrayed that her sister was going against the warrior code. _**(Oh, as if it isn't broken every other day anyway.)**_

Tranquilpaw told Screepaw. "Go back to camp! I will handle this on my own." Screepaw touched his nose to hers one last time before running away.

"What is going on?" Moonpaw asked. She tried to keep a level head.

"Nothing!" Tranquilpaw mewed nervously. She was not very good at lying. _**(Last minute exposition. What a great writer.)**_

Moonpaw meowed. "Tranquilpaw, I know you are seeing Screepaw now! It is against the warrior code for a medicine cat to have a mate. You can not be with him!"

"But I love Screepaw!" Tranquilpaw cried. "You can not tell me I can not be with him!" _**(She just did.)**_

"Ha ha ha!" Came Lilypaw's voice. He stepped out of the bushes. "I heard all of your conversation! And now I am going to go tell Vanillastar and Tranquilpaw will be banished from the clan!" _**(Gasp!)**_

"Lilypaw, please do not!" Cried Tranquilpaw. "I am your sister!"

Lilypaw spat on the ground. "That means nothing to me! You are both weak! You are not my family!" He ran back to camp.

"No!" Tranquilpaw cried. "Now I will never see Screepaw again!"

"Don't worry." Moonpaw assured her. "We will catch up to him! Come with me!" They ran after Lilypaw, but he was faster! He ran into camp, yowling, "Vanillastar! Vanillastar! Come out!"

Vanillastar emerged from his den and looked very alarmed. "Yes, Lilypaw? What is it?"

Moonpaw and Tranquilpaw had finally caught up to Lilypaw.

"Do not listen to whatever he tells you!" Meowed Moonpaw.

Vanillastar looked around at the three apprentices. "What is going on?" He demanded.

"Tranquilpaw and Screepaw have fallen in love!" Lilypaw smiled evilly. "It is against the warrior code! Banish her at once!"

"WHAT?!" Vanillastar turned and hissed at Tranquilpaw and Screepaw. "This is against the warrior code! Explain yourselves!"

The two apprentices looked at each other lovingly and Tranquilpaw mewed. "It is true. We do love each other! But what is wrong with that? Is it so wrong to love another cat?"

"But it is against the warrior code!" Vanillastar hissed. "As punishment, you two will be banished forever from SapphireClan!"

"Stop!" Moonpaw yowled. "She is my sister! If you banish them, I will leave, too! And I will never become leader!" _**(And Mary-suepaw saves them all. But come to think of it, as rogues Screepaw and Tranquilpaw could be together, so...)**_

Gasps came from all the cats. "No!" Many of them cried. "Please don't go! You have special powers that our clan needs!" _**(*Sue Alarm is very loud*)**_

Vanillastar stared at her in shock. "But you promised you would!" He whispered, helpless. "I can not have this job forever! I am no good at being leader!"

"Then let my sister stay!" Moonpaw narrowed her eyes, scaring Vanillastar a little bit. _**(Scared of an apprentice? Seriously?)**_ "I can feel that StarClan approves it!"

"Fine!" Vanillastar bowed his head. "I am sorry, Tranquilpaw, Screepaw. I do not think that it is right for you two to see each other because it is against the warrior code, but if Moonpaw says that StarClan approves of it, then I guess it is OK." _**(Sue Clue number 145: Everyone listens to them, but they are just an apprentice.)**_

Tranquilpaw and Screepaw smiled widely and touched each other's noses. They walked back into the trees, their tails wound around each other.

Lilypaw scowled. He walked up to Moonpaw and growled. "I will get rid of you all one day! This is the only time you will win!"

Moonpaw shook her head and meowed wisely. "No, brother. Love will always triumph over evil. That is why Screepaw and Tranquilpaw were not banished. It will do you good to learn this. I know there is good in you!" _**(Face the facts, your brother is evil.)**_

Lilypaw's eyes narrowed and he hissed. "There is no good in me! Stop trying to change me! I am happy with who I am and I hate you!" He ran off.

Moonpaw sniffled a little. Was there any hope at all for Lilypaw? If he turned _**(Turned?) **_evil, she might have to fight him, and she could not bear to fight her dear brother! She went to the apprentices den, for she was very tired and the sun was already setting. She fell asleep before she even knew it! She started to dream something very strange! A beautiful she-cat gracefully walked up to her and touched noses with her, purring.

"My beautiful daughter." She mewed. "I am very, very proud of you! You have allowed your sister to be in love and be happy. I have never been more proud in my life!"

Moonpaw gasped! This was her mother! "Daydreamheart!" She meowed in shock. "StarClan are not angry with me, are they?"

Daydreamheart shook her head. "No, my beloved daughter. They are not. They are very pleased with the decision that you made! You made the right choice!" She looked away. "But now, I am afraid I must go! Always remember that I love you, Moonpaw!" She faded away. _**(Sue Clue number 146: StarClan visits them even though they aren't leader/medicine cat.)**_

Moonpaw woke up. "Mother!" She realized that she was not there anymore, but she was very happy to have met her! But she was also very sad because she knew that Daydreamheart was dead. _**(Shouldn't she have already known?)**_

The next day was cloudy and gray. Raindrops fell from the sky and thunder crashed! All the cats were huddled inside and afraid to come out! Moonpaw sat at the entrance to the den, the lightning flashes brightening up her beautiful, gorgeous face. _**(Redundant and repetitive much a lot?) **_Lilypaw liked the flashes of lightning and the booming thunder. He had an evil smile on his face and the lightning made him look sinister! Moonpaw was not afraid of him, though, for he would always be her beloved brother! _**(Sue Clue number 147: Thinks everyone she loves is a saint.)**_

Moonpaw heard a cry from outside! Tranquilpaw came running in, tears streaming down her cheeks! "Come help!" She cried. "Screepaw needs help!"

Moonpaw dashed out into the rain! "What?" she asked. "Is Screepaw in trouble?"

Tranquilpaw looked at Moonpaw thankfully. "Oh, Moonpaw! Thank StarClan! You are the only one who can help Screepaw!" Her eyes were filled with panic! "Screepaw and I were in the forest when a bolt of lightning struck a tree! It has fallen on Screepaw! I would heal him, but I can not get him out from under it!" She let out a sorrowful yowl.

Moonpaw rested her head on Tranquilpaw's. "It is okay!" She told her. "We will get him out I promise!" She looked around the camp. "Who will come with me?" She called.

All of the cats were quiet! Moonpaw yowled. "You are all cowards! Screepaw needs us!"

None of the cats answered! Tranquilpaw meowed loudly. "Please, everybody! Come or Screepaw will die! Please, be brave like Moonpaw and come to help!"

The cats still stayed in their dens! They were far too afraid of the thunder and lightning and rain! Tranquilpaw cried some more and Moonpaw whispered. "Do not worry, Tranquilpaw! We will get him out! Just lead me to where he is!"  
Tranquilpaw smiled at Moonpaw. "Thank you Moonpaw." She mewed. "You are very brave cat and I am so thankful you are my sister!" _**(Le barf)**_ They started running.

They both ran very far into the forest. The rain was making them very wet and the thunder hurt their ears! But they ran on anyway! They came to the fallen tree with Screepaw underneath it. His eyes were wide open and he cried. "Tranquilpaw! You came back!"

Moonpaw yowled to Tranquilpaw. "Push the tree with me!" They pushed the gigantic tree off of Screepaw!

Screepaw started breathing slower. "Tranquilpaw," He meowed quietly. "Tranquilpaw…I love you."

Tranquilpaw started crying. "I love you too Screepaw! But I will heal you and you will live!"

Screepaw shook his head sadly. "No, Tranquilpaw. It is too late. I will…" His voice faded and he lay still. He had been killed by the tree and then died. _**(Yup, you are killed and **__then __**you die.)**_

"NO!" Tranquilpaw cried. "Screepaw, come back! Come back! I can not live without you!"

"Wait!" Moonpaw meowed. "Tranquilpaw, please move aside because I can bring him back to life!" Moonpaw summoned her StarClan powers and touched her nose to Screepaw. Will it work?! _**(Yes, because she's a sue!)**_

Screepaw's eyes opened again. "Moonpaw!" He meowed gratefully. "You have saved my life! Now Tranquilpaw and I can be together forever and it is because of you!" He and Tranquilpaw bowed their heads to Moonpaw. _**(Sue Clue number 148: She can raise the dead.)**_

"We are forever in debt to you." They said.

Moonpaw smiled. "No." She said. "I was very happy to help! You do not owe me anything! I am just happy that you are both alive and in love! Remember, love will always prevail!" She secretly hoped that one day she would find love, too. _**(Le barf)**_

"Now let us go back!" Meowed Tranquilpaw. "Even though they did not help us we are still part of the clan!"

They all ran back. The sun was shining brightly and all the clouds and rain were gone! All the cats were out and playing! _**(Sue Clue number 149: After she does something good, the weather changes.)**_

"Moonpaw! Tranquilpaw! Screepaw!" meowed Braveheart! "You are all safe!"

"Yes!" Cursedheart cheered. "Thank StarClan you are all okay! We were very, very worried about you!"

Moonpaw shook her head. "No!" She meowed. "Do not talk to us! Tranquilpaw and I were the only cats who weren't afraid to go get Screepaw! He could have been dead! I do not know if we can forgive you!"

"Forgive us please!" Cried Thunderingbreeze. "We were too afraid to go out into the rain! We are not brave like you!"

"We did not want Screepaw to die!" Webstream agreed. "But there was thunder and lightning and one of us might have died!"

"Screepaw do you forgive them?" Moonpaw asked him. "The choice is yours!"

Screepaw nodded. "I forgive all of you but do not think I will forget this! If it was not for Moonpaw's extraordinary powers I would be dead by now! I owe my life to her!" _**(Sue Clue number 150: "extraordinary powers")**_

The cats gasped. "Did you bring him back to life too, Moonpaw?" One asked.

"Yes I did." Said Moonpaw.

The cats stared at her in awe! "You are amazing, Moonpaw!" One of them meowed. "We might not even need a medicine cat anymore!"

Tranquilpaw looked very sad so Moonpaw said. "Enough! We need medicine cats! I will not bring every dead cat back to life because that is not the will of StarClan! We do not want the clan overpopulating do we? I brought Screepaw back to life because he is in love with Tranquilpaw and it would have been terrible for them to part!" _**(Sue Clue number 151: It's all right to revive cats for your sister's happiness but not your Clan's well-being.)**_

"You are right!" Vanillastar said. "Listen to Moonpaw, for she is very wise! If the clan overpopulates we will run out of food and other clans might try to take advantage of us!" _**(Sue Clue number 152: The leader orders everyone to listen to her.)**_

The cats nodded in agreement.

"Well then," Moonpaw said. "We are all very tired so we will be going to the apprentices den for some sleep!"

Tranquilpaw went back to the medicine cat den because she was a medicine cat _**(Well ya don't say!) **_and Moonpaw and Screepaw went back to the apprentices den where they fell asleep. But Moonpaw thought she saw something very evil in Lilypaw's rainbow eyes when she came in the den! _**(Lilypaw has rainbow eyes. Very manly.) **_She had nightmares all night! _**(No, she had nightmares all day.)**_

_**Well, that's chapter three! Hope you enjoyed! I'll post a new chapter on Monday, but until then keep your pants dry and your barf bags handy, because Hidden Prophices is getting ridiculed!**_


	6. Goodbye

_**Guys, I'm sorry.**_

_**I've stopped working on this. It just isn't that much fun for me anymore. School being school, and with a bunch of other stuff going on, I don't have time or motivation for this project. You reviewers were the best, and I know I'm letting you down, but this is it.**_

_**Kitewing out.**_


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